Woman on seeing the price of the bottle of 30 year old Scotch her boyfriend is examining: "Why don't you just buy a bottle of 10 year old Scotch and put it away for 20 years?"
Alas, it doesn't work that way. Spirits, unlike wine, do not age in the bottle. It's the interplay between the spirit, the wood of the barrel, and the air that gets into the barrel that produces the salutary properties that one associates with well-aged liquor. Alternating warm and cool weather forces spirit into and out of the wood of the barrel, which leaches out the vanilla flavors and amber color from the wood (and also the residual sherry, if the barrels happen to be used sherry butts). The oxygen in the air oxidizes the spirit, helping to take some of the edge off of it. (Note that the limited amount of air in an open liquor bottle can also have an oxidizing effect, although a very limited one when compared to the oxidizing effect of the barrel.) So if you want a 30 year old Scotch, you have to pony up the cash to pay for the 30 year old Scotch. Either that, or find a rich friend you can sponge off of.
(And if I were to spring for a bottle of 30 year old Scotch, it probably would be a Macallan, which is known for its talent with older whiskies.)
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